People are always on the hunt for the one magical ingredient that turns a regular relationship into “the one”. There are thousands of blog posts on what to look for in a relationship, in a potential partner and in yourself.
Networks make billions of dollars on reality tv shows that follow broken relationships. There are doctors, psychologists and so-called experts that try and provide all sorts of therapy to help these couples overcome their issues. And some of those issues are huge.
It really all boils down to one missing attribute: Communication.
Communication is the glue that keeps your relationship together. Even on reality television it’s wildly apparent that these relationships lack communication. They fight over not being appreciated enough, about one partner not fulfilling a need, about having different goals or wants out of life.
After lust, attraction and commitment, communication is often barely an afterthought.
You might be able to communicate with your significant level on some levels but not on others. For example you might have a routine about talking about your days but then keep quiet when you’re annoyed about his lack of ambition.
5 Keys to Healthy Relationship Communication:
- Be open about your thoughts and feelings, even if it makes you feel uncomfortable. Hiding your true feelings can lead to resentment
- Don’t go to sleep angry, it’s an old cliche, but it’s important to talk about your feelings and express how something makes you feel, don’t stew on it.
- Understand and listen when your partner talks with you, don’t just skate over their input so you can share your own. Try to repeat and provide feedback to validate their thoughts and feelings.
- Talk in person, with all the texting, iming and snap chatting it’s surprising we still have face to face communication. It’s imperative to talk with your partner in person. Words on a screen are interpreted differently than words from a mouth.
- Don’t shy away from issues, if it’s something that is important to you, don’t sweep it under the rug to deal with later. Unspoken issues are more likely to cause a rift than spoken ones.